Monday, February 06, 2006

Got called a b**** today

Couldn't believe it! i mean, perhaps if I was ever to be called a b**** by a friend, he/she would be the one to call me that, but still it wasn't quite expected. I don't think i said or did anything to deserve it.

Basically what happened was that early in the morning I ran into that person while we were both seeing patients/running errands. Then he/she said that he/she had time for lunch and asked me to page him/her when i have lunch. (This is not uncommom at hospital.) I hesistantly said Ok cos I wasn't sure if I'd have time for a proper lunch. Then around midday, I was getting hungry but still had things to do on the wards and I had brought lunch today. So I paged that person to say that I was sorry but I couldn't have lunch with him/her because of all these reasons. That person's immediately reply was "b****". I was like, "WHAT!?!" and then i think he/she might've said sorry or just something to dismiss it.

I don't think I did anything wrong. I mean, we aren't kids anymore and we can have lunch on our own now. It's not like it would be awkard having lunch by yourself. Besides, there's always people in the common room and this person is totally not shy! And if he/she thought it'd be nice to have lunch with me, he/she should've respected me enough not to call me a b****!!

I am not mad, it's just that I don't understand. I am cautious of my speech and actions when i deal with people cos I am a Christian and I want my life to reflect my faith in Christ. I want people to have at least an average opinion of me and not one that may deserve to be called a b****. I don't think I can simply blame this all on that person. Some people do use words like that freely but I don't think he would/she would use words like that on everyone. I can think of people in our circle that he/she would NOT have called a b****, and this excludes people he/she wants to impress or people he knows he would get into deep trouble with had he used that word. Also, i don't think the fact that we are friends to the level that we often tease each other explains this incident. He/she might think that I have a good sense of humour or that I am easy going, but to call me a b**** is still inappropriate.

So there must be something I am doing wrong for me to be called that! Um, have to be even more cautious in the future now. He/she know that I am a Christian, or at least that I go to church, and he's opinion of me is that I can sometimes be called a b****?!?!?! What does he think of Christians?!? What does he think of God/Jesus!?!

posted by zhinger @ 8:05 pm

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